Harry Potter: The Witty Wizard

When Harry returned downstairs he looked to the senior auror and asked, "Can you make a copy of the letter Dumbledore sent me?"

The auror frowned but warily replied, "I... can..."

"Can I have one, please," he said. "If the old man's actually written something, I'd like to know what it says."

The auror gave nod and pulled the evidence bag out of her pocket. She then simply created a copy of the entire thing and handed the copy to Harry.

Harry was quick to remove the letter and vanish the bag. He didn't need or want that.

Carrying it into the dinette, he sat at the table and read it. It only took him a couple of minutes.

~ # ~

Mister Harry Potter

c/- Doctor and Doctor Granger

Granger Residence

Wimbledon

Harry my boy,

This letter should have been a portkey that would have brought you directly to my secure care. If you're currently reading this it means it, somehow, failed.

Harry, it is very important you immediately return to the safety of our wonderful school. Outside of the blood wards I painstakingly placed on the home of your loving aunt and uncle you are at risk of serious harm unless you're under the wards of Hogwarts.

I cannot stress this enough with you. You must return to dear Hogwarts immediately.

With you staying at the parents of Miss Granger, you have placed her and them in extreme danger. Those who wish to do you harm will not hesitate in harming them in trying to get to you. Please do not be so careless of their well-being by remaining there.

I know you may not think well of me at the moment, but I have always had your safety at the forefront of my mind. The wizarding world owes you so much and I feel it is my duty to ensure your safety.

On a second matter, as a champion in the Tri-Wizard Tournament your attendance is mandatory at the Yule Ball. This event will be held, as the name suggests, on Christmas night.

There is now only a little over two weeks until that night and you need to be prepared for your role in it. As a representative of the school, you will be upholding the honour of Hogwarts. A poor performance on your part, not only will be widely published in the wizarding press and on radio, but will also reflect on Hogwarts.

For both your own urgent safety and the honour of Hogwarts, as your true friend I must urge you most strongly to come home to the castle with all due haste.

Yours,

Professor Albus Dumbledore

~ # ~

As he finished, Harry was at first stunned by the man's audacity, before then laughing to himself to the point he was almost crying.

'Oh, Gods!' he thought. 'This is just tooooo funny!'

When Hermione came down carrying her bookbag, ready to learn more about wizarding British society, he grinned and handed her the letter.

"Read this, if you would," he smirked as she sat at the table and took it. "Then take note of the words he used - especially his choice to use and what he used as adverbs and adjectives."

As Hermione read through it, she began to frown. Once she was done she scanned back through it and began to mutter, "That... manipulative... old... so-and-so!"

He nodded back with a grin and said, "He can't seem to get it through his head that his little tricks of phrasing and the like, whether written or verbal, just don't work on me."

"So, what are you going to do?" she asked.

He gave a grin and replied, "Retaliate in like manner, of course!"

"You're going to send him an auto-portkey?" she asked.

"No, but thank you for the idea," he said. "A portkey made by anyone but the Headmistress won't work through the Hogwarts wards."

"Then, how did Dumbledore manage it?" she asked.

"I'd say the portkey was already made," he said. "But, that's just me. No, my idea is to respond to his letter using the same word-trickery he tried to employ. However, I intend to go way over the top."

She laughed and said, "You're incorrigible, you know that?" Then she smirked and pulled her bookbag across the table top towards herself. "I'll get parchment, ink and quill out."

However, she'd no sooner readied the stationery when the auror with them at the time, Cassidy, gave a start and did that peering off into the distance thing. "Visitors," she muttered.

Already knowing not to follow her, both teens waited in the dinette.

As the auror walked to the front door they heard the knock.

Less than fifteen seconds later she walked in leading Madam Bones and two more aurors.

'Her bodyguard,' thought Harry.

Hermione immediately rose from her side of the dinette opposite Harry and moved around to his side. Harry slid across to the next chair to give her room.

Madam Bones smoothly slid into the seat Hermione had just vacated.

"Lord Potter, Miss Granger," she said.

"Good morning, Madam Bones," Hermione politely replied for them both. "I take it you're here because of the portkey incident, this morning?"

"Indeed," said the woman. "Because there was an auror present in the room at the time, I don't need to ask either of you for a copy of your own memories of the event. I'm just here to let you know I'm already investigating."

"Lord Black contact you yet?" asked Harry.

"He has," she nodded. "He's... quite upset."

"It's alright to say he was ready to blow his top," smiled Harry. "He was right ropable when I finished my call with him."

"As your godfather, he wishes to press charges against the culprit," she said. "As you're now an adult in your own right―"

"I wish to also make a formal complaint," replied Harry. "And, yes, I'm aware of the possible result of a successful prosecution against him."

"Whether or not I have a chance at a successful prosecution, as you put it, is not for you to worry about," she said. "That's my concern."

When Harry gave a short nod back, she said, "I'll take the complaint now; but, I've already begun my investigation. The complaint just makes it official."

Again a Dicta-quill was produced and Harry verbally gave his complaint. He never mentioned Dumbledore by name as the one he was making a complaint about, but did mention that his bonded house elf reported directly to him that the portkey deposited him into Dumbledore's presence at Hogwarts.

When he was done, the Dicta-quill was packed away and the now completed statement was properly signed by Harry and witnessed by her and Senior Auror Charlotte Cassidy.

'That's her name!' thought Harry of the current senior female auror currently overseeing them.

With that aside she then flat-out asked, in the presence of the aurors concerned no less, "Do you have any issue with how the aurors on-site at the time handled the situation?"

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